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Posted by on Feb 20, 2020 in Coaching, General |

Big Changes, Right Time

Firstly, don’t use 1st January as the date to start a big change.  The time to set a new goal or resolution is when we have the burning desire for change in our life.  And it really helps to think about what exactly it is that we want.  For example, what will it be like once we’ve got it?  After all, if we’re going to shed some weight, how will we know when we’re slim enough?  What do we feel like, how do other people react to us, how do we move, what are we wearing?  Know what it is we’re aiming for.  This isn’t just a one time thing – we must spend some time every day visualising what our new life will be like.  The more we imagine it, the more real it will become and the more likely we are to work towards making it happen.

Secondly, it will help to write a letter to ourselves.  Tell ourselves what we want and why we want it.  Tell ourselves how important it is and what benefits it will bring to our lifes.  Think about the benefits to the people who are important to us – but mostly make sure that we know why it is important for us.  Tell ourselves about what is happening in our life right now that is helping  or preventing us from achieving our goal.  Most of all, we must be totally honest with ourselves – no one else is going to read this letter.  When we find ourselves writing things like, “I can’t because I’m no good at…” we need to challenge with  “who say’s I’m no good at…” or “just because I couldn’t do that when I was 16 doesn’t mean I can’t do it now.”

Then really start to let our imaginations fly – think about all the different things we could do to achieve our goal, from the sensible to the really weird.  There are no limits here – just ideas.  New goals might appear – or exciting ways to achieve the ordinary.  There’s no right or wrong so ust go with it and be creative.  They’re only thoughts and they can’t hurt or embarrass us.  What we will learn is our thoughts and ideas are just as good as anyone else’s.  In fact, they’re better than anyone else’s –they’re ours!  And sometimes, out of the weirdest and most bizarre, some exciting and achievable idea may immerge.

So, uut of all of those thoughts, pick one idea.  The one that appeals, the one that will work for you.  End the letter to by writing  “I will do….” and set a date that to do this by.

When what we want to do is quite a big thing, it helps to break it down into smaller steps.  For example, if we want to move house it is less stressful to achieve smaller steps.  Getting where we live now ready for sale might be a big task on its own.  However, whatever you decide take action.  Do anything.  Even the smallest thing – just a few minutes each day – to get started.  Setting a date for each step really helps.   And be kind to yourself.  None of us have to do it all at once.  Whether that’s a week, a month or a couple of years – we all get there when the time is right. 

Never give up.  If New Year teaches us one thing, it is that we have dreams, desires and ambitions.  Never give up on yourself – you are an amazing person and you deserve to live your life to the full.  Believe in yourself and go for it.